Hi Jayashree,

Being an HR person, you have to understand, that the issue you are raising has lot to do with the culture of the orgainzation where you work and not with your perspective.

It is very important that you maintain a strong positive relationship with the subordinates, peers and superiors in the organisations, if you want to be successful in an organisation.

If your working relationship with the CEO is not smooth it is going to create lot of heartburns for you in times to come and work place becomes hell for you.

There are situations where sometimes juniors or less experienced employees are promoted over highly qualified experieced ones. This is not only limited to India but very much evident in world over, whether they MNCs or small enterprises.

Therefore the only adivise I can give you is that you have to fall in line with the culture of the organisation where you presently work, whetehr you like or not. You cannot carry on with personal grudges or egos ignoring values, norms and accpted behavioros of the company.

Hence try to bulid a strong professional relationship with your superiors and peers and respect the company culture. For that if you have to say Sir or Madam to somebody whom you dont like, please do it. Otherwise you will not be able to survive in the organisation.

With the best wishes for

HS Jayawardana
Sri Lanka

From Sri Lanka
Hi,

I would suggest, act like an HR. Even if you hate the person, HR should not show it. You should smile and get over it.

I was in a similar situation, I had joined this small company for 100 people as HR. The Finance manager here was rude. He was handling the accounts of the company alone. So he felt like a King and he thought he could treat people like grass. When I use to see mails from him with rude remarks like HR team is good for nothing , data is always wrong etc.

My boss has hired me to take over One and all HR role for the company. When i completed my KT and started working with this Finance manager directly, i figured out he is also not so perfect, He makes lots of errors. But he has been escaping because no one was there to validated the data.

Please note even if i figured out the errors in his work , I never embarrassed him in front of others with that. I always send mail just to him showcasing where he went wrong. and just kept my boss informed verbally.

Now he is bearable, even if he is not a sweetheart :).

Think on these lines. Being aggressive never solved anything . Look at Hitler ;).

Leave the Ego aside , call him Sir. You know and he know , that is not due to respect. And keep an eye on him. He is human , tend to make mistakes. :)

Regards,

Neethu.

From India, Bangalore
Dear Mam,
This is all your wish whether to respect any person or not because we get what we give to others. Your senior is getting what he has done to others but If you will be like him it will not solve any problem. the best approach would be to call him Mr + Surname.
This should solve the problem Mr. + Surname is very professional way to address anybody. it will neither create any tension between you and arrogant senior nor will look unprofessional. There are a lot of people whom we don't like at work place being them arrogant or bad in speaking or nymphomaniac fools but we should always keep in mind before reacting that we work for a particular company and if we do not save its culture we are not good employees. Now cheer up and calm yourself if he create any more troubles try to talk to seniors in your company any get TAT and work procedure made and act accordingly as per the procedure made.
Thanks,

From India, New Delhi
Dear all,
If he is too senior than you with age and experience, you can call him Sir. If he is junior to you in position you can call him by using Mr..... or First Name. But whatever the position is respecting the workers is a main attitude for HR. I am senior HR and i respect everyone, even i call my assistant with respect words, so they have good image on me, they think they are respected... Its not a problem of respecting elders, it is also our politeness to elders and also it delivers our gentleness. As we are in India, and in our culture both men and women respect elders. We are not in western culture. So throw your ego and respect others, not only senior junior also.. As you are in HR...Its people resources...Think it.

From Kuwait, Kuwait
R u going to loose anything by calling him as SIR....
Is he gaining anything when you call him as SIR...
Nothing is going to happen.
Please address him as SIR, finish off.. Why land up in unnecessary fuss for yourself.
Also, Please understand that just because we call anyone by name, we cannot address everyone by name...

From India, Coimbatore
Hi Jayasree,

If some one is professional , he/she will not spend time to scrutinies how you called him whether, sir or his/her name.Because he/ she will be more focused on their day to day work and don't find time for analyzing how you called him. They just give their heart and soul to the organization and spend their valuable time for which they are hired. As an HR manager you should be more alert when you address some body. Why because you need to initiate the diplomacy in your organization. Even though he is arrogant he will not be like that all the office hours. As human being he will also enjoy jokes, music , food etc. When you initiate the talks you need to start with general talking , subjects like Global financial crisis, or difficulty of getting candidates etc etc. I tell you once you started on a positive mood he will also open his heart and you can analyze what is his problem. Then you can decide he is good or bad. If you think he is bad just communicate with him over gentle mails and if you think he is good you should start speaking with him rather than mails. Also understand how old he is, generally men are not interested to get called their names by a lady who is younger than him irrelevant of designs.

So please try the diplomacy , and understand even some male candidates are supporting you ,it should not be of the sympathy to you they have , but the jealousy or grudge they have with the said person.

From India, New Delhi
Dear all
Above discussion refer our slave mentality imparted by britishers. And it is existing only in India ( Hindustan - which includes India, Pakistan and Bangladesh ).
In all over the world the man is addressed with Mr. XXXX and women with Madam / mam.
We have a very rich cultural heritage in india than why still people carring on with those slave mentality. We can address man with adding Ji to his name and it will show more respectful and proper. Hope My friends Jayshreeji, Simhanji, Abdulji, Anilji, Vikasji, zulfikarji, Bhaskarji and Nikhilji would understand my views with true Indian spirit.
Jai Hind
Lalit

From India, Ahmadabad
HI To all Its Nice to see a Good contribution from all of you SIR & Mam But i dont find this in all the thread why?????????????????????????????????????????????

Hi,
Jayashree
Seen your letter, firstly take it clearly that being a HR person u should have patenice because our responsibility is to protect human resource and correct plannning the resource at the time of need.
Calling him Sir, U are not going to get smaller than him instead of that he will be not having no question to argue with u.
secondly taking about the words spoked by him, god has grant as two ears just put them on dustbin on daily basis.
All HR are being paid by the comanies management and not alone by the CEO.
First concerte on your job do it well , speaking about the communication report all the subject related matters to your immediate related boss as he is the only person whom u are depending.
all the things will be on line with in few days.
Regards
Raj
Asst.Manager.
9003503082

From India, Madras
Dear Jayashree,
Without crossing the worst situations, no one can touch the best corners of Life. So Always taste worst situation for the best result.
By the way we also respect "Biscuits" by affixing "JI" remerber "Parle JI"
Regards.
Prafulla

From India, Pune
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