ONE BEDROOM FLAT...!!!

ONE BEDROOM FLAT: AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER'S LIFE -A Bitter Reality but a real one....

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software Engineer and joined a company based in USA, the land of braves and opportunity.

When

I arrived in the USA, it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat. I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate. In-laws told me,to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it was time to return to USA, after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA. My wife enjoyed this

country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The

frequency of calling India increased to twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing. After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children. Every year I decide to go to India. But part work part monetary conditions prevented it.

Years went by and visiting India was a distant dream.Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India. The next message I got was my parents were passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents were passed away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to return to the USA.

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in India. My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in USA. I decided that had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to India. I had just enough money to buy a decent 2 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality. Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after staying in India, had a house to his name and I too have the same nothing more. I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing. This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are losing their values and culture because of it. I get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me. Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them. But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'

"Ability can take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there.

"

From India
Hi Navroz,
I am littlebit disturbed after going through the article.
I luv my parents verymuch, mom is 68 and dad 77.
They are Illiterate and living in pakka village, me in the city,
they are not accepting to stay in the city. I need to earn to keep them
well. To spend for their hospitality, going for angiyogram for my mom next week.
But, I feel I really miss them a lot, each and every minute thinking of them, eventhough I am with my habi and my kids.
Don't know what to do.. I am in a travel distance of 9 hours,
eventhough I feel a lot.....
Article is very touchy..
Wordless to express my feelings....
Previously I planned to resign and go back to take care of my parents..
Financially I am in a position to stay here...
Just to share my worries...
Regards,
Vennila N

From India, Madras
True. Nowadays people are not giving values to relationships. they are running behind money. i remember a saying which i read long time back. Not able to get the exact words but the menaing is this..
.
If everyone starts asking that question "Was it really worth?" i am sure many would feel bad about taking some decisions.
Vennila - Dont feel bad abt it. Thats life.
This was a nice posting. truly touchy.
~Raghav

From India, Kochi
Hi Navroz,
Really good posting, meaningful and touchy. It is quite true that nowadays people are leading mechanical life. They do not have time for anything and by the time we realise it . it is already late.
It is indeed ironical that especially for working parents, they do not find much time to spend with their children as they are busy securing their chidlren's future and by the time they retire their children will not be having time for them ...that is the endless saga of life. Hence we should try to make the best use of whatever little time we can spend with our family. After all " FAMILY should always be our first priority"
Regards,
Sindhu

From India, Delhi
Dear All,
Thanks for your feedback but the incident will all the things mentioned below remains to be true.
In this busy life what we could best do to keep every body is very simple at the same time it is very difficult too.
Now a days Mobiles are very common, handy, cheap and readily available every where - what every1 or may be at least we could do is - call our loved ones - may be all the relatives at least once a week to check about them how they are - and the loved ones you can call daily (in the below case of Vennila) OR visit them on the weekends to check their health etc.
May be this can help them as well as satisfy you to some extent.
With Thanks, Cheers and Regards,
Navroz

From India
Hi,

Real Good posting...

As mentioned by Vennila, it happens in everyone's life. I too live in a diff city and my parents are living in a village. My dad is still working in a Bank and whatever he is earning today after 30+ years of experience i'm getting that amount by now. But the kind of life they live in, i cant think about it even some 20years later. Such a peaceful life.. Own House, his kids are settled in good jobs, good friends and caring neighbours etc... Mostly good food and healthy life. But here even after earning so much we are not happy. Some thing makes us to feel that we miss something...

But thats the irony of life... Need to accept it... When we start running behind money for various reasons, we cant stop the race.

But still i always feel that atleast once in a year we need to go back to our place for 15days or so and be the real person near our parents by switching off our mobile and things like that..

Our future generation should know what is Indian Culture, tradition, values etc...

I'm praying that atleast this should happen from this year onwards...

Regards

Anu

From India, Madras
This is a wonderful post and am sure it has touched everybody's heart whoever has read it.
We all want to earn more and keep ourselves and our family happy, but still we are never happy and do not have enough to be satisfied. I still stay with my parents and sometimes I think of working abroad for a better career profile. But true to the above post, I think will it benefit anyone?
Thanks for sharing.
regards
anuradha

From India, Delhi
Hi Anuradha,
first of all thank you very much for the reply,
But overall if you see the person who has stayed with the family and worked for them - at the end of his life is more happy than the other who has made some property for the (so called family members) parents who will not be alive when the property comes into existence.
Hope that every1 keeps their family happy and have a good day ahead.
Regards........Navroz

From India
That’s why I don’t wanna leave India ever!!



ONE BEDROOM FLAT...

WRITTEN BY AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER..

A Bitter Reality

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in

Software Engineering and joined a company based in USA, the

land of braves and opportunity. When I arrived in the USA, it

was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I

would be staying in this country for about Five years in which

time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement,

the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.

I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling

homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and

speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone

cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and

pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange

rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have

only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within

these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight.

Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for

all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be

talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through

all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting

shorter I was forced to select one candidate.

In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get

married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After

the marriage, it was time to return to USA, after giving some

money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after

them, we returned to USA.

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she

started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India

increased to twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our

savings started diminishing.



After two more years we started to

have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to us

by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked

me to come to Indiaso that they can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to India… But part work part

monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting

Indiawas a distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a

message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I

couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India ... The

next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there

was no one to do the last rights the society members had done

whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed

away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children's

dislike and my wife's joy we returned to Indiato settle down.

I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my

savings were short and the property prices had gone up during

all these years. I had to return to the USA...

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to

stay in India... My 2 children and I returned to USAafter

promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an

American and my son was happy living in USA... I decided that

had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to India... I

had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a

well-developed locality.

Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is

for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife

has also left me and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this?



My father, even after staying in India,



Had a house to his name and I too have

the same nothing more.

I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.

This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these

children are losing their values and culture because of it. I

get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well

at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will

be performing my last rights, God Bless them.



But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'

I am still searching for an answer.................!!!



START THINKING



IS IT JUST FOR ONE EXTRA BEDROOM???



LIFE IS BEYOND THIS …..DON'T JUST LEAVE YOUR LIFE ……..

START LIVING IT …….

LIVE ITAS YOU WANT IT TO BE …….

Cheers

SJ

From India, Patna
ONE BEDROOM FLAT
WRITTEN BY AN INDIAN ENGINEER...... A Bitter Reality

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Engineering and joined a company based in USA, the land of braves and opportunity. When I arrived in the USA, it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.

I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.
In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it was time to return to USA, after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA.

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India increased to twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing.
After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to India But part work part monetary conditions prevented it... Years went by and visiting India was a distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India ... The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to return to the USA ...
My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in India ... My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in USA ... I decided that had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to India ...... I had just enough money to buy a decent
02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality.
Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this?

My father, even after staying in India,

Had a house to his name and I too have the same nothing more.

I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.. This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are losing their values and culture because of it. I get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them.

But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'

I am still searching for an answer..........!!!

START THINKING
IS IT JUST FOR ONE EXTRA BEDROOM???
LIFE IS BEYOND THIS DON'T JUST LEAVE YOUR LIFE START LIVING IT...
LIVE IT AS YOU WANT IT TO BE

"Experience is what you get , When you dont get what you want..."

From India, Mumbai
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