Take a look at an apple tree.
There might be five hundred apples on the tree, each with ten seeds.
That's
a lot of seeds. We might ask, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow
just
a few more trees?"
Nature has something to teach us here. It's telling us: "Most seeds
never
grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try
more than once.
This might mean:
You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job.
You'll interview forty people to find one good employee.
You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, car, vacuum cleaner,
insurance policy, or idea.
And you might meet a hundred acquaintances to find one special
friend.
When we understand the "Law of the Seed", we don't get so disappointed.
We
stop feeling like victims. Laws of nature are not things to take
personally.
We just need to understand them ,
and work with them.
IN A NUTSHELL
Successful people fail more often. They plant more seeds.
When Things Are Beyond Your Control, Here's a recipe for permanent
misery:
a) Decide how you think the world SHOULD be.
b) Make rules for how everyone SHOULD behave.
Then, when the world doesn't obey your rules, get angry!
That's what miserable people do!
Let's say you expect that:
Friends SHOULD return favors.
People SHOULD appreciate you.
Planes SHOULD arrive on time.
Everyone SHOULD be honest.
Your spouse SHOULD remember your birthday.
These expectations may sound reasonable. But often, these things won't
happen! So you end up frustrated and disappointed. There's a better
strategy. Have less demands. Instead, have preferences! For things that
are
beyond your control, tell yourself: "I WOULD PREFER "A", BUT IF "B"
HAPPENS,
IT'S OK TOO!" This is really a game that you play in your head. It is a
shift in attitude, and it gives you more peace of mind.
You prefer that people are polite ...
but when they are rude, it doesn't ruin your day.
You prefer sunshine ...
but rain is ok!
To become happier,
we either need to
a) change the world, or
b) change our thinking.
It is easier to change our thinking!
IN A NUTSHELL
It's not what happens to you that determines your happiness.
It's how you think about what happens to you.
Cheers
Anu
From India, Madras
1There might be five hundred apples on the tree, each with ten seeds.
That's
a lot of seeds. We might ask, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow
just
a few more trees?"
Nature has something to teach us here. It's telling us: "Most seeds
never
grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try
more than once.
This might mean:
You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job.
You'll interview forty people to find one good employee.
You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, car, vacuum cleaner,
insurance policy, or idea.
And you might meet a hundred acquaintances to find one special
friend.
When we understand the "Law of the Seed", we don't get so disappointed.
We
stop feeling like victims. Laws of nature are not things to take
personally.
We just need to understand them ,
and work with them.
IN A NUTSHELL
Successful people fail more often. They plant more seeds.
When Things Are Beyond Your Control, Here's a recipe for permanent
misery:
a) Decide how you think the world SHOULD be.
b) Make rules for how everyone SHOULD behave.
Then, when the world doesn't obey your rules, get angry!
That's what miserable people do!
Let's say you expect that:
Friends SHOULD return favors.
People SHOULD appreciate you.
Planes SHOULD arrive on time.
Everyone SHOULD be honest.
Your spouse SHOULD remember your birthday.
These expectations may sound reasonable. But often, these things won't
happen! So you end up frustrated and disappointed. There's a better
strategy. Have less demands. Instead, have preferences! For things that
are
beyond your control, tell yourself: "I WOULD PREFER "A", BUT IF "B"
HAPPENS,
IT'S OK TOO!" This is really a game that you play in your head. It is a
shift in attitude, and it gives you more peace of mind.
You prefer that people are polite ...
but when they are rude, it doesn't ruin your day.
You prefer sunshine ...
but rain is ok!
To become happier,
we either need to
a) change the world, or
b) change our thinking.
It is easier to change our thinking!
IN A NUTSHELL
It's not what happens to you that determines your happiness.
It's how you think about what happens to you.
Cheers
Anu
From India, Madras
Hi Anu,
Superb one, but easier said than done??
Here is one which gives some more revelation.
Quote:
Most of us spend a greater part of our lives worrying about things not
going right. Right? But did just worrying about a situation ever changes anything?
Did it make a child come home sooner?
Or a test score higher?
Did it put money in your pocket?
Or a ring on someone's finger?
Make a car run smoother?
Or did it help get a better job?
No! All it did was waste a lot of time.
So what should we do instead of worrying? There's this little story I read
which I found quite revealing:
There was an old man who operated a rowboat for ferrying passengers between
an island and the mainland. One day a passenger noticed that he had painted
on one oar the word Work, and on the other oar the word Faith. Curiosity
led him to ask the meaning of this.
The old man replied, "I will show you." Dropping one oar, he rowed only
with the oar named Work. Of course, the boat just went around in circles.
Then he switched oars, picking up Faith and dropping Works. And the little
rowboat went around in circles again-this time in the opposite direction.
After this demonstration, the old man picked up both oars Faith and Work,
and rowing with both oars together swiftly coursed over the water.
He looked at the passenger and said, "You see, that is the way it is in
life as well as in rowing a boat. You got to keep both oars in the water,
otherwise, you'll just go in circles..!"
And that's how worry comes about, when we go round in circles. We worry
like crazy and then visit every temple, mosque and church about some
problem, praying that God will do something, and going back home, hope for
a miracle. Worry is simply when we use one oar in the water.
We worry about a problem and start working from morning to nightfall on it,
yet can't come up with a solution. We burn the midnight oil, we go without
food or keep unhealthy timings with our sleep and finally find we are
nowhere near reaching the answer and then we start worrying why things are
not happening.
Work and Faith go together my friend.
There's no point praying for a miracle in your exams if you haven't studied
hard enough. If you have then pray God will give you the peace and calm
during the exams to recollect everything; and He will.
Or asking for a promotion or a new job if you are lazy.
It won't happen, and you'll just go round in circles.
So stop worrying, put both your oars into the river of life and start
rowing. You'll find unbelievable miracles happening..!
Unquote
Thanks
Bala
From India, Madras
Superb one, but easier said than done??
Here is one which gives some more revelation.
Quote:
Most of us spend a greater part of our lives worrying about things not
going right. Right? But did just worrying about a situation ever changes anything?
Did it make a child come home sooner?
Or a test score higher?
Did it put money in your pocket?
Or a ring on someone's finger?
Make a car run smoother?
Or did it help get a better job?
No! All it did was waste a lot of time.
So what should we do instead of worrying? There's this little story I read
which I found quite revealing:
There was an old man who operated a rowboat for ferrying passengers between
an island and the mainland. One day a passenger noticed that he had painted
on one oar the word Work, and on the other oar the word Faith. Curiosity
led him to ask the meaning of this.
The old man replied, "I will show you." Dropping one oar, he rowed only
with the oar named Work. Of course, the boat just went around in circles.
Then he switched oars, picking up Faith and dropping Works. And the little
rowboat went around in circles again-this time in the opposite direction.
After this demonstration, the old man picked up both oars Faith and Work,
and rowing with both oars together swiftly coursed over the water.
He looked at the passenger and said, "You see, that is the way it is in
life as well as in rowing a boat. You got to keep both oars in the water,
otherwise, you'll just go in circles..!"
And that's how worry comes about, when we go round in circles. We worry
like crazy and then visit every temple, mosque and church about some
problem, praying that God will do something, and going back home, hope for
a miracle. Worry is simply when we use one oar in the water.
We worry about a problem and start working from morning to nightfall on it,
yet can't come up with a solution. We burn the midnight oil, we go without
food or keep unhealthy timings with our sleep and finally find we are
nowhere near reaching the answer and then we start worrying why things are
not happening.
Work and Faith go together my friend.
There's no point praying for a miracle in your exams if you haven't studied
hard enough. If you have then pray God will give you the peace and calm
during the exams to recollect everything; and He will.
Or asking for a promotion or a new job if you are lazy.
It won't happen, and you'll just go round in circles.
So stop worrying, put both your oars into the river of life and start
rowing. You'll find unbelievable miracles happening..!
Unquote
Thanks
Bala
From India, Madras
Namaskar.
I find two wise persons here(at the time of writing this post I find Anujji and Balaji in the thread.
Let me precise what they say.
Anuji says-War to self as " The more you use should and why in your vocabulary for others the moe miserable you are. Beware." (why is implied and made explicit).
Balaji says just one word- spontaneity. Honour it.
regards
From India, Delhi
I find two wise persons here(at the time of writing this post I find Anujji and Balaji in the thread.
Let me precise what they say.
Anuji says-War to self as " The more you use should and why in your vocabulary for others the moe miserable you are. Beware." (why is implied and made explicit).
Balaji says just one word- spontaneity. Honour it.
regards
From India, Delhi
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