Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just the one. You want to make something of it, eh?
Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Arians aren't afraid of the dark.
Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one Arian, but an awful lot of light bulbs. (*smash*)
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy so...
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: A hundred, but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light to the world.
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Like, why don't you just get out of my face and stop asking me to do all your work for you? I'm, like, really totally sick and tired of you asking me questions.
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grief process.
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one, and they'll use a non-disposable diaper too!
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: A Cancerian would worry herself to death with the problem.
Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Capricorns can't afford new lightbulbs --- unless they're a legitimate business expense.
From India, Madras
13A: Just the one. You want to make something of it, eh?
Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Arians aren't afraid of the dark.
Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one Arian, but an awful lot of light bulbs. (*smash*)
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy so...
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: A hundred, but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light to the world.
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Like, why don't you just get out of my face and stop asking me to do all your work for you? I'm, like, really totally sick and tired of you asking me questions.
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grief process.
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one, and they'll use a non-disposable diaper too!
Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: A Cancerian would worry herself to death with the problem.
Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Capricorns can't afford new lightbulbs --- unless they're a legitimate business expense.
From India, Madras
After Sex Comments:
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"
Taurus: "I'm hungry--pass the pizza."
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."
Sagittarius: "Don't call me--I'll call you."
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"
From India, Madras
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"
Taurus: "I'm hungry--pass the pizza."
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."
Sagittarius: "Don't call me--I'll call you."
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"
From India, Madras
Cars and zodiac signs: What would the signs drive?
Aries: Something fast... and red!
Taurus: A volvo
Gemini: Car? you mean two cars.
Cancer: A family car
Leo: A limo.. with a chauffeur
Virgo: An economic car. Virgo will have it clean and neat and ready to drive everyone everywhere.
Libra: Will not be able to make a choice and will end up riding with friends.
Scoprio: something in a dark color.. fumed windows. No one will know what it looks like inside
Sagiattrius: What car? The Sag is on a plane right now.
Capricorn: A mercedes benz..
Aquarius: The waterbearer takes buses and subways. Cars are for snobby people.
Pisces: Doesn't matter. Pisces will always be too stoned to remember the partking spot.
From India, Madras
Aries: Something fast... and red!
Taurus: A volvo
Gemini: Car? you mean two cars.
Cancer: A family car
Leo: A limo.. with a chauffeur
Virgo: An economic car. Virgo will have it clean and neat and ready to drive everyone everywhere.
Libra: Will not be able to make a choice and will end up riding with friends.
Scoprio: something in a dark color.. fumed windows. No one will know what it looks like inside
Sagiattrius: What car? The Sag is on a plane right now.
Capricorn: A mercedes benz..
Aquarius: The waterbearer takes buses and subways. Cars are for snobby people.
Pisces: Doesn't matter. Pisces will always be too stoned to remember the partking spot.
From India, Madras
Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.
Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Why should I bother? It's probably just going to burn out again tomorrow anyway.
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two, but the job never gets done --- they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done!
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two (of course) but it will take all week and when they're done the light bulb will do your homework, speak French and shine any colour you want from it.
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. Plus a portable phone, an Internet link and a copy of the "Bluffer's Guide to Changing Lightbulbs."
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: A Leo would order somebody else to change it.
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Leos are so enthusiastic they carry their own light.
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Leos don't change lightbulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo in to do the job for them while they're out.
Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well gee, I don't know really. I guess it depends on the bulb and where it burned out. It might perhaps take just one if it's just an ordinary bulb, but maybe two if the person doesn't know where to find a new light bulb, or perhaps ...
Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Why change the bulb? Isn't it more romantic in the dark?
From India, Madras
A: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.
Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Why should I bother? It's probably just going to burn out again tomorrow anyway.
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two, but the job never gets done --- they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done!
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two (of course) but it will take all week and when they're done the light bulb will do your homework, speak French and shine any colour you want from it.
Q: How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. Plus a portable phone, an Internet link and a copy of the "Bluffer's Guide to Changing Lightbulbs."
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: A Leo would order somebody else to change it.
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: Leos are so enthusiastic they carry their own light.
Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Leos don't change lightbulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo in to do the job for them while they're out.
Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well gee, I don't know really. I guess it depends on the bulb and where it burned out. It might perhaps take just one if it's just an ordinary bulb, but maybe two if the person doesn't know where to find a new light bulb, or perhaps ...
Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Why change the bulb? Isn't it more romantic in the dark?
From India, Madras
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